I can trust Him!!!

By Stephanie Chebet

Sometime back (June 2018) at a friend’s house I came across a book titled “Trusting God”-Even when life hurts by Jerry bridges, I took it and immediately started reading. Let me take you back 3 years to June 2015. I was asked to consider moving to a different town and take up a leadership role that I honestly felt unprepared for, but such is life right? After praying, talking to close friends and of course my mentor, I decided to move after all it was temporal, plus I didn’t want to over-think it. So in August of the same year I packed my earthly belongings …in this case 2 suitcases… (Note: I owned more things but I wanted change, as they say change is as good as rest,) and moved to this new town.

So fast forward>>> 2016 in a top management meeting I drop a bombshell on my team leader, I wanted out, I wanted to go back to my hometown, I wanted to go back to my little lovely house, to my ministry peeps, to drinking fresh cold milk, to drinking clean water from the tap….to my squad (By the way I actually thought I had a whole cheering squad, little did I know, it was quite small). We agreed with my team leader that I would hold on since there were no open vacancies, so I stayed on. Then I began to sink into self-pity and for the very first time felt very lonely. I struggled with many things from the weather, to my neighborhood; to the culture and the food but such is life right? I survived 3 years on……

Where was I? Oh, 2018 I stumbled upon this book by Jerry bridges and I began to understand why God sent me to this “Strange city” I learnt 3 lessons:

  1. God is completely sovereign
  2. God is infinite in wisdom
  3. God is perfect in love .

In 2018 for 3 months I got an opportunity to travel and learn new things about my work, experienced a new culture and God spoke to me during my stay there from Esther 4:10-11; Mordecai asked Esther to intercede with King Xerxes on behalf of the Jews, she demurred with the explanation that she could enter the kings presence unbidden only on the threat of death. However Mordecai sent word back to her “For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place but you and your father’s family will perish, and who knows but that you’ve come to royal position for such a time as this?” God in his infinite wisdom and resource was not limited to Esther’s response; the options available to God to bring about deliverance for the Jews were as infinite as his wisdom and power. He literally did not need Esther’s cooperation but in this instance, he chose to use her.

I had to wake up to the reality that God wanted me in this city, that He is God of this city , just like the children of Israel in Egypt God intended good for them in the land of slavery. My stay has made me discover that I can cook, host campus girls, help a group of 3 ladies grow in their walk with God and Christ-likeness, travel, swim strange things huh!!! Amazingly God desires that I trust him in everything, everyday.

I look at my life as a round cake; that Christ is the center of my life, I can’t give God everything expect that one slice which I want to hold on to, he has to have the whole cake not minus one slice.  Can I trust God? I cannot trust God in isolation from all other areas of my life. To grow in my ability to trust God in times of doubt and adversity, I must first lay a solid foundation of a daily intentional relationship with him, only as I know him intimately and seek to obey him completely will I be able to establish a trust relationship with God, so yes I can trust God!!!

So where am I now, I am in this city, learning to trust God daily and yes it is a journey!!!

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